It is no secret that relationships come with challenges. Sometimes things can seem so tricky that separation might feel like the only thing that can save your marriage. But is a break a step in the right direction, or will it lead your relationship even further off the rails?
- Does Separation Save a Marriage?
- Should You Have Rules When You Have a Trial Separation?
- A Trial Separation: The Pros and Cons
- So Can a Trial Separation Save a Marriage or Not?
Does Separation Save a Marriage?
Deciding to Take a Break
A trial separation might seem counter-intuitive when you are trying to save your marriage. However, many couples have had great success by having a trial separation. Of course, all relationships are different. We can’t say for sure that trial separations work for all relationships because they differ. A trial separation can change many things in your relationship, which is why it is hard to predict whether it will be successful.
Communication is Key
Some couples find the time apart to be excellent in giving them a chance to reflect on how they feel and what they want. They discover that they can communicate easier after taking some time apart. However, couples who struggled with communication before separation might think that a trial separation makes it more difficult to talk.
Appreciate the One You Love
Many couples feel a newfound appreciation for their partner after some time apart. There are various reasons for this, including:
- any resentment that partners had could have faded with their absence
- partners find a new exciting sense of self-reliance that is refreshing to their partners
- they miss the friendship or common interests
Whether they have realized how much their partner does for them or just felt a longing for that special someone, they feel a great sense of appreciation for their partners again. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, and for many couples, this is very true.
Not All Relationships are Created Equal
It is essential to remember that every relationship is unique. Therefore, what works for one couple, might not work for you.
Couples considering a trial separation can watch the video by Mend the Marriage before starting their trial. The fantastic team includes relationship experts who are ready to give you their advice.
Should You Have Rules When You Have a Trial Separation?
When you and your partner decide to try a trial separation, you enter into new territory. Therefore, you must have goals and rules to stay on the same page while taking time apart. Although it might be challenging to sit and talk about the guidelines before starting your trial separation, you must do so if you want to achieve the right results.
Divorce is a big decision, and it isn’t a thought that we like to think about. Therefore, if you and your partner have reached the point where a trial separation feels like the only option left, set things up correctly to give yourselves the best chance of success. Before starting your trial separation, discuss these factors.
What is Your Goal?
Communicate about what you hope would change during the trial separation. Being honest about your goals is critical to ensuring you are on the same page.
Do You Want to Get Support?
Having an Enhancement Separation is something that you need to discuss with your partner before starting your trial separation. If you would like to get professional help, mention this to your partner. You can discuss the help offered by Mend the Marriage with your partner. Agreeing to marriage counseling is something you need to do before you start your trial separation.
What are the Ground Rules?
It is recommended that a trial separation should be between three and six months. A trial separation of longer than 12 months should always be avoided. It is essential to talk to your partner about how long you plan to have your trial separation and how often you’ll communicate during this time. It would be best if you also talked about acceptable things to both of you and those that aren’t. For example, it is common for couples not to date other people while having a trial separation.
What Else Should You be Considering Before you Start your Trial Separation?
There are a few factors that you need to be clear about before you start your trial separation. These factors are:
- Deciding on the living arrangements. Who is leaving, and where will they live during the trial separation?
- Talk about the property you share. How will you divide up the use of things that are owned by both of you? Who will use the car and electronics?
- If you have children, you need to be clear about visitation and discuss the trial separation with them.
A Trial Separation: The Pros and Cons
The pros of a trial separation include:
- A trial separation gives you and your partner time and space to reevaluate how you feel. It also gives you time and space to realize your partner’s value in your life.
- Time apart can help you let go of issues or resentment of the past.
- You and your partner get the chance to take a break and focus on yourself and your problems. You can work on self-care and work on your shortcomings.
- A break from your marriage gives you the chance to get a new perspective on your relationship and your life.
Here are the cons to a trial separation:
- Unfortunately, a trial separation creates even more distance between some couples. They might feel it is even more challenging to communicate that before the trial separation. They drift away from each other and find it hard to reconnect.
- Some people feel free and independent once they try a trial separation. They might prefer this newly found independence and would choose not to reunite.
- Agreeing to a trial separation could lead to a new approach to avoiding conflict or friction in the marriage. In this case, whenever the couple experiences difficulty, they would quickly choose a trial separation instead of dealing with the issues at hand. Of course, this isn’t a permanent solution.
So Can a Trial Separation Save a Marriage or Not?
Relationships don’t fit a mold, and it isn’t easy to say whether a trial separation will do the trick. It might be the answer for one couple, but not for the next. However, if a couple feels that it is a trial separation or divorce, having a trial separation is worth a try. Of course, you must communicate before starting your trial separation clearly and stick to the plan.
It is also essential to get the help of a professional. By getting in touch with a marriage consultant, you and your partner can get advice and work through issues with the assistance of a trained professional that shows no bias. If you want the best in marriage guidance, look no further than Mend the Marriage. They are ready to help you and your partner find your way to each other today.
Building a life with the one you love isn’t always easy, but it is worth it if you are willing to communicate and seek help. By taking a breath of air and having time to reassess, you and your partner might remember exactly what it was that made you fall in love in the first place.