How to Reconnect After a Relationship Break

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There are many reasons why people consider taking a break from a relationship. A break can provide a way to see things objectively, reset the relationship, and build a healthier relationship with your significant other. Going on a break can end in catastrophe, especially if you and your partner can’t seem to reconnect. It may be a bit awkward after you start seeing each other again, but this should be seen as an opportunity to start the relationship fresh and forget past hurts.

What is a Relationship Break?

A relationship break means taking time off from a relationship and each other. It doesn’t denote an official break-up; rather it indicates that the concerned individuals still care about each other but need time apart to gain some clarity regarding the relationship. A break helps you to introspect, reflect, reevaluate, process your feelings, and resolve to either continue with the relationship or not.

Going on a break doesn’t mean you automatically stop loving your partner. Instead, it is used to get to the root of problems you may be having in your relationship.

When Do Couples Take a Relationship Break?

Many people take a break when the only alternative is to break up. Couples facing difficulties, challenges, and doubts about their relationship but don’t want to give up on the relationship usually decide to take a break.

For instance, a couple in a romantic, healthy relationship may care deeply for each other but always find themselves bickering. Taking a step back from the relationship and confronting the root of their issues may help the couple regroup and build a healthier relationship. A break also helps people who have doubts about their partners to think clearly and objectively.

According to relationship experts, here are some valid reasons for taking a relationship break:

  • Having difficulty managing the relationship
  • You and your partner can’t seem to find time for each other
  • Too many fights and arguments
  • Either one of you cheated
  • Having doubts about the relationship surviving in the long run
  • You’re no longer happy in the relationship
  • You feel the relationship is draining you
happy couple having coffee

How to Reconnect after a Break

Taking a relationship break may be hard, but figuring out when to end the break and how to reconnect with your partner can be even harder. Here are some tips that will help you reconnect after a break and make your relationship stronger.

Have a Truthful Conversation with Your Partner

You’ve not been around your partner for a while, so it’s normal to miss them. Honesty and transparency are excellent communication tools. Be honest about your feelings and tell them you missed them. It’s also important to tell each other everything you did during the break.

While talking with your partner, ensure the conversation isn’t forced. They should share the things they did during the break without you forcing them to. Don’t put too much pressure on them, but let them know you are around to listen to anything they would like to share.

Take Accountability for Past Actions

You and your partner may choose not to talk about past events. In that case, all you have to do is move on and start afresh. However, if you both want to talk about the issues you had in the past, do it with an open mind and without criticizing each other’s perspective.

Be accountable for your actions and apologize if you need to. If your partner apologizes, accept the apology gracefully without dragging it out by throwing more accusations around.

Ask Questions

A great way to reconnect after a relationship break is by asking your current partner open-ended questions. You may compile a list of questions that require more than a one-word answer. Asking and answering these questions will foster emotional intimacy.

Relationship breaks are tough, but they can serve as a learning experience. You can discuss what you learned during the time apart and what can be changed moving forward. There are a lot of questions you can ask your partner to have a better idea of what they’re feeling. Some questions you can ask them include:

  • What have you learned about yourself during the break?
  • Why was the break necessary?
  • How do you suppose the break helped our relationship?
  • Where do you need to take responsibility?
  • What new ways of managing conflicts have you picked up?

Make Time for Each Other

You can hardly reconnect without spending quality time with each other. You have spent a considerable amount of time apart, so spending as much time together as possible is essential. There are various activities you can both do, such as going on long walks or watching a movie, or even having dinner together and talking about your day.

Quality time is one of the five love languages, and it’s one of the building blocks of a healthy and happy relationship. Give your partner your undivided attention when you’re with them and don’t be scared to make eye contact. Actively listen to them and be mentally present.

Rekindle the Romance

Rekindling the romance that was once present in the relationship is a great way of hitting reset. You don’t necessarily have to make a huge gesture at first. You may start by getting them flowers and complimenting them. Get them gifts and go on dinner dates. Always remember to appreciate them.

Be Kind

The break may not have been easy for either of you, and the time spent apart put you through a lot. Choose to be a compassionate partner. Your significant other might be having a more difficult time wrapping their head around recent events, and both of you may be struggling with your feelings and dealing with difficult emotions. Being kind to each other will make it easier to reconnect.

Will a Break Irrevocably Ruin a Relationship?

Of course not. A relationship can return to normal after the partners have spent some time apart. However, to achieve a healthy relationship, both partners must offer equal effort. A relationship break will not ruin your relationship if you and your partner are determined not to let it do so. Take accountability for past actions and be honest with each other.


Reconnecting with your partner may not be easy, and it may take some time to feel that connection you once had. However, with consistency, patience, and determination, effortless flow with your partner will return. If you have trouble working through an issue on your own, you may seek a couples’ therapist for help.

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