Why Did my Husband Cheat if he Loves me?

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It is often said that a man who loves his wife will not cheat on her. But yet it does happen. How is it possible that a man can love his wife but still look around at other women, is the question many women ask?

According to those professionals who work with these couples, it is possible that he still loves his wife even when he cheats. There is a long list of excuses, and some believe that it is part of him and it will keep on happening.

But let’s take a look at why these things happen and if what they say is true, “once a cheater always a cheater”.

Why does He Cheat?

There are many excuses from those cheating husbands when you ask them, and they try to explain why they did it. Most of the time, when you ask the man who cheated if he still loves his wife, the answer will be yes.

These women are many times in the eyes of the observer, the perfect wife, so why does he cheat on her? Some of these experts believe that a cheating husband cheats on the woman he loves for different reasons.

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The fact that they have no previous relationship experience may cause them not to understand that their actions hurt their partner. They simply do not think of the consequences or understand the hurt their actions may cause.

Another problem with this is that such a man is also not mature enough to value or appreciate the women in his life. That is why the husband cheats on the perfect wife; he still loves her but does not think about what those actions may cause.

Lack Of Self Control

Another reason professionals bring up when a husband cheats on his loving and perfect wife is because of addictions, which include sex addiction. Other types of addictions like alcohol or drug addictions may also be the underlying problem for their lack of self-control.

Many times the good wife covers up those problems by assisting them in the addictions, but that may soon backfire on them. This will make her feel even more betrayed by the cheating husband after everything she did for him.


Insecurity in one person can lead to them feeling dissatisfied with themselves, and they try to hide this by having some secrecy. This secrecy may lead to starting to flirt with other women, and this, in the end, may lead to infidelity.

This sounds like one of those excuses why a husband cheats on his wife, but it may lead to problems if this is not addressed. The best way to prevent this is for the couple to have open communication, even about those uncomfortable and embarrassing topics.


Revenge may also cause a husband to cheat on his wife for something she did to him, which may sound childish. But this does happen. For instance, if his wife humiliates him in front of other people, that anger may turn into revenge.

It is true that he should rather try to resolve this by talking to her, but revenge is the best way in his head. So to humiliate her, he simply cheats on her to see what her reactions are to that act of betrayal.

This is also because of a lack of communication in a relationship, which could have been resolved by talking about it. This betrayal, where the intention of the husband was to hurt his wife, may be difficult to overcome and need a lot of repairs.

He Wants to End the Relationship

Husbands often give this reason when asked why they were cheating on their wife in a seemingly good relationship. This may sound like a heartless explanation, but this happened when those people were in an unhappy relationship they wanted to get out of.

The fact that the wife is perfect does not guarantee a happy marriage, and the husband may not be happy in this relationship. That has nothing to do with her or anything that she did. He is just not happy and wants to move on.

But he simply does not know how to end the relationship, so he opts for the cheating way to force her to leave him. This is all on him; the problem is that women may think there was something wrong with them, so his actions have consequences.

This cheating husband will not stay. He did it for the simple reason to get out of the relationship and go on with his life.

Will It Happen Again?

This is a question the women in these relationships ask themselves, especially if they are trying to save the relationship: is this going to happen again? The husband was caught cheating, and now he regrets his actions and feels guilty about it. Is this enough to save the marriage?

This is where the couple will have to work together to find the root of the problem why the husband cheated to start with. It is not going to be easy to move on from here, but if the husband really regrets it and wants to change, there is a way.

That is, if he still loves his wife before and even after cheating on her, she should get a commitment from his side. The wife should also keep in mind that it was all his decision and not her fault that he cheated on her.

Many times men who find themselves in a midlife crisis cheat on their wives because of insecurities and their own issues. Even though he is still a loving husband and loves his wife, he failed her, and the hurt will stay for a long time.


So why did my husband cheat if he loves me? As you can see, there are a myriad of excuses why husbands cheat on their wives, and none of them are justified. The best way for a married couple to prevent this is to have open and clear communication in their relationship.

Jealousy, hurt, and pain can build up in a marriage that has suffered from infidelity.  But if you want to learn the fastest way to get your husband back, why not learn from successful couples who have been there before?  

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